Allen Fogle
Allen Fogle aspires to die on Mars. He’s considering breakfast right now, and also how many burpees he’s done today (we call burpees “Allens” FYI) (used in a sentence, for example: “man, how many Allens did you get in today?”) He’s a cook and boardgamer. A brilliant horn player who is on basically every movie soundtrack right now, he often makes music with every legit orchestra in Southern California, and also he’s a sometimes gigglefactory. Allen’s obsessed with YouTube, but just really obsessed with being good at many things, and knowing everything about those things. He’s our principal backfield soloist (which means we send him behind the audience to scare them with horn calls all the time), he’s very serious, and also our most fashionable friend.